Godstoppedby

Friday, April 29, 2011

Goliath

  So we spent most of the day at the hospital. When that happens, it's kind of like watching reruns, only the faces change. The story is predictable, because we've seen it so many times, but then, every once in a while, something happens that we forgot about, and we get surprised. Sometimes that is pleasant, sometimes not so much. Today the surprise was good. We got to go home.
  I could turn this into a rant about everything that did not go well, but that would be so ungrateful and unloving. Instead, I am thankful for the nurse who started Adam's IV with one stick of the needle. I am thankful for the doctors who patiently listened to him as he tried to speak with them. I am thankful for the technicians who thought Adam was a lady-killer and knew he liked the pretty nurses. They teased him and joked with him as they prepared him for the CT scan. Adam was laughing, and it made him relax and hold still so that the test did not have to be repeated. These young men were not much older than he is. As I write this I am tempted to go to the place of disappointment for all the things Adam doesn't get to do...like college and driving and dating, but instead I will turn my thoughts to the fact that he is graduating from his educational program in June. He is 21 years old. We have had a few times when we did not think he would make it to that birthday. And we are so thankful to the One who has made it possible for him to still be here with us. He stopped by this morning and made that possible again.
  Adam woke up at 3:00 this morning and within a very few minutes began screaming in pain from a headache.  There was absolutely no consoling him or helping him, and I knew we needed to get him to the hospital, and quickly. That kind of pain indicates that his shunt is not working and this can quickly become a life and death situation. I could not even put his braces and shoes on him, because the pain in his feet was unbearable. He also has peripheral neuropathy, and this time the pressure in his head intensified the problem in his feet. Paul had to lift him into the car when we got outside. Thank the Lord for his wheelchair...
As I was helping Adam get into his chair I prayed some quick battle prayers for him and for his life and we left. He began to calm down almost immediately and we did not have to go to the nearest hospital but were able to go to Stony Brook University Hospital where most of his doctors have priviledges. (normally a 30 minute ride but Paul made it in 15)  I was so thankful as it makes the whole ordeal that much easier. Stony Brook has all of his records since the beginning of this journey when he was just 5 weeks old.
  The CT scan was ok...things looked about the same as in his last scan. The shunt x-rays were good; no breaks in the connections. The decision was that he probably had a blockage in the shunt, preventing passage of fluid out of his brain, and that it had managed to clear itself. This has happened before. This is the type of rerun surprise that we like. The other kind we will leave unexplored tonight because I don't like to visit that scenario.
So why did I name this post Goliath? After we came home today, and I had some time to think about the events of the day and to thank the Lord for His intervention. He showed me that this issue is our Goliath. It is the giant that we face and have not yet defeated. I say not yet because I believe we will have the victory. It is ours and the battle is the Lord's. I Samuel 17 tells the story of David and Goliath, how a young man defeated a giant with a sling and a stone. He did not claim any glory for himself in that victory, but gave glory to God for his success. "You come against me with spear, sword and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty....this day the Lord will hand you over to me..." We wait for the day when the Lord will hand this enemy over to us, and we stand in His name until the day of deliverance comes. I saw the connection between the brook where David selected 5 smooth stones for his sling, and the name of the hospital. Stony Brook.  With a play on words, the Lord was showing me the battle in a different light. I might select 5 stones for the battle, but just as David needed only one stone to fell his enemy, there is only One who will win the battle, and slay this enemy for us. His name is Jesus. Thank you, Lord. You are so good.

Monday, April 11, 2011

What Does Love Look Like?

I spent most of the weekend at a conference. I didn't stay overnight at the hotel as it is too expensive, and I need to go back and forth anyway to take care of my family. It is a bit draining that way, but I don't really mind except for the last night, when I get so tired and would love to just go upstairs to a nice clean room and crawl into bed and sleep for a solid eight or ten or maybe even twelve hours. So I stayed late the last night, chatting with friends and laughing a lot. "A merry heart is good like medicine.."...apparantly Adam thinks so too because he was wide awake when I got home and stayed up until after four o'clock in the morning. He thought it was good to be awake at that hour, and was happy to see me. I was looking forward to seeing him too, but I was looking forward to seeing him asleep. It is funny how God stops by and works patience into me....we laughed a little bit and I gave him all the hugs he thought he missed out on in my absence, and then sat up and waited for him to go back to sleep. He sang and talked to himself for a long time after I left his room.
  One of the conference speakers, Heidi Baker, is one of the most humble and amazing people on the planet. Her love for God and people is truly inspiring to me. No matter how much the conference staff try to gently move her into the next venue, she will always take as long as is neccesary to touch and bless and love on every single person who is waiting for her. She signs the book that you just bought; she listens to your story and the desires of your heart and she prays with you; she will not be wisked quickly away or be protected by assigned body guards...God has more important things for her to do than lunch with a waiting crowd. Her actions remind me of what Jesus said one time to His disciples who were worried about mealtime "I have food that you don't know about....what nourishes me is to love the people that my Abba puts all around me." (gg's revised  version)
Her message this weekend? "Love looks like something...it's not just words...it's actions... it's what you do." I want to be one who loves in word and deed, who reaches my hand out to a broken and dying world; but in order to do that well, I need to have the eyes to see where my Abba is sending me. Or maybe who He is sending to me. I want to go to Mozambique and experience what love in action looks like there, but I think the Lord will show me where my lunch is right here on Long Island. I'm sure it will nourish me well.