Heidi and me

Once or twice a year, I volunteer to serve at a local conference venue, sponsored by Matt Sorger Ministries. I usually serve in the "green room", where the worship band and volunteers spend down time to relax and eat. I have a "mother anointing" so this suits me well. I meet lots of people and get to help them in small ways while we have meals together.
At one of the conferences a few years ago, I was getting back from cleaning up after dinner. It had taken me a bit longer than I expected, and I was hurrying to get in and find my seat. As I was sneaking in the side door of the conference room, I saw Heidi Baker and her assisstant. She had arrived a little bit late from the airport and needed to get to her seat in the front of the room.They were looking for the way in and didn't want to go in through the back doors.  (That is the long way in, and she would be swamped by all the people who love her.And she would stop and try to acknowledge every one.)As I was about to enter I called her over and showed her the side front doors...she was so thankful and gracious and wanted to know if she was very late. I assured her that she was not and that worship had only started a few minutes prior to her arrival and escorted her and her friend to their seats. I felt so blessed to have been able to help her.
That was also the first time I heard AND saw her speak. She is sweet and humble and loves the Lord so much. And that was the first time I heard her pray this prayer..."I'm just a little woman Lord, but if you can use me for anything, I will do it." I loved that prayer and I prayed it too.
In 2010, I had the opportunity to see her again at one of the MSM conferences. She is the reason I went to that one. And she prayed that prayer again. It's the one she prayed before she became the woman who changed the nation of Mozambique. And I prayed it with her once again. Something changed in me that day. I have been changing ever since.
About a month later, I heard the word from the Lord that inspired me and brought more change in me. My thinking has changed, my understanding has changed, and there is now a book in me about the prodigal son, his elder brother and their Father. It is amazing to me that such a small prayer could change me so much, but it has. I feel like I have finally stopped struggling with so many things and can rest in God. He knows who I am, what He wants to acccomplish in and through me, and He is able to do it. Thank you Heidi and thank you Father.

11/11/11+4

I have been thinking about this date, what it meant and what may have changed. 11 is the number for transition and standing in the gap/intercession. A friend who read my post the other day reminded me that chaos often precededs change. I know it can be very difficult when we are between the now and the not yet.  She mentioned that two thirds of her day were chaotic also on the 11th.  I talked with some friends today about the occurrences of the day for them, and most of them said the same thing; it was a chaotic day!
Change is happening in and around me. I have heard it said that the chaos of change can be like childbirth. Shortly before the baby is born, there is the stage of labor called transition.  This is a very intense time for the mother, baby and everyone involved with the delivery. The contractions get stronger and longer, with less time to rest in between. Everyone in the room is focused solely on the woman giving birth and the protection of the little life about to enter the world. The doctor and nurses and husband are coaching the woman in labor, encouraging her to keep pushing and to not give up too soon. She is very focused on her body, what is happening to it, and is not able to do more than ride the crest of the pain and PUSH. Her pushing will eventually bring forth something wonderful, but until she is delivered, she can only focus on the intensity of the work of childbirth.
I have realized that there are many changes going on in my life right now. It's been for a few months in particular, and I can't see the end from here. I do recognize that I have changed, that I am changing, and that I will change again. This is a good thing, even when I don't understand it all. I have decided that I am like the woman in labor, and that I am very focused on the transition I am in. I will get to the birth of the new thing, and I will rejoice over it just as I rejoiced when my daughters were born.
So 11/11/11 was a significant day after all, besides being Friday and the end of a busy week. (for which I was truly thankful.) It was a day to remind me to keep my focus, keep praying, and not give up. It just took me four days to realize God actually did stop by.

And you may want to check this out:
Transitions and Times of Refreshing: the blog of Doug Addison. He's a well known prophtic guy and comic. here's the link; you will find it interesting.   http://blog.dougaddison.com/

11/11/11

I was expecting this to be a day of unusual occurrances. I thought something profound was going to happen or be revealed to me. Well, it was. I realized that three grandchildren can take out one Grammie. They wear me out! How did I manage to rear my three girls? How did I keep up with them? The three grandchildren I had in my home today are the champions of divide and conquer. The minute I go to help one, the other two go in completely  different directions. I get one settled and the other two are discovering uncharted territory in another area of the house. Mind you, I have two bedrooms closed off to them and the bathroom door is also shut to prevent catastrophies like toys and shoes disappearing down the toilet. When Maggie can reach the doorknob I am in big trouble. The fish tank is duct taped shut so that no plastic frogs or Matchbox cars  end up in with the fish. Goldfish don't appreciate interior design. The cats are smarter than me; they disappeared for a few hours.
 I think it will be safe, so I let the kids pile every pillow they can find on the den floor. This is perfect for jumping, but jumping becomes diving head-first, and then flipping over, and then I'm running and shouting to prevent permanent damage from happening to their precious little bodies.  I am still pretty fast, but I wonder how much longer I will be able to outrun them...Gavin informed me today that he is faster than me....which he isn't but it won't be much longer before he is.
Adam wants a movie on in his room. Gavin is watching Curious George in the den..Maggie is going back and forth to see who is the most distracted and what she can take away from them. I am standing in the kitchen where I can monitor all areas of the house. I rarely sit down..I don't dare. That is when they really ARE faster than me and someone can get into trouble that I can't get them out of...I can only kiss the boo-boos and/or clean up the damage. I have to sneak off for a bathroom break or I will find Maggie in the middle of the kitchen table or on top of the counter. She can push the chairs around to climb wherever she wants to. And she never gives up trying.
 I make some tea and continue to stand guard. Maggie has some lunch and goes in for a nap. Then the boys have lunch and I do too. I have put off the craft projects until after Maggie is sleeping...I need a little peace before I tackle glitter, glue, crayons, markers and whatever other wonders are in the big blue shoe box. It is not difficult with just two, but when you add a 19 month old into the mix, it is hands on and eyes wide open the whole time she is creating. She still likes to taste everything. The good part of it is that it keeps them occupied and out of trouble for an hour or more.

Gavin was still drawing when Maggie woke up. She was ready to go and sat right in her booster chair and started making line after line and tiny little circles on her paper. She let me help her glue on some dried Play-Doh beads. Then she picked them off again, observed how they stuck to her fingers, and shoved them in her mouth. I am so thankful for non-toxic toys.
Paul came home in the midst of the mess, and the kids all ran to greet him. He loves that and looks forward to it whenever grandkids are here. He brought home a 20 piece box of chicken nuggets.The kids sat down to eat.  Jodi got here to pick up Gavin and Maggie a while later.
My great revelation for the day? THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY.

TALL TALES AND ELISHA

I watched a great movie with Adam this afternoon. We have watched it before and I felt the same way the last time as I did today. This movie has a such a wondeful message for fathers and children especially. It 's called TALL TALE  and stars Patrick Swayze and Oliver Platt. It is about the coming of the railroad to the prarie in the late 1800's.
Daniel listens to his father tell him the tall tales that the American west was known for.( Do they still teach about these in school today? I remember loving Pecos Bill, Paul Bunyan and Babe,his big blue ox, and John Henry. The point of tall tales is the the more outrageous they are, the better they are.)
Daniel seems to have little patience for the stories his father tells him. He is becoming a young man and restless for more than the farm.
The railroad is coming into their territory and buying up all the land they can, pushing farmers off their property.Daniel's father will have none of it. He stands firm and says he will not sell at any price and tells Daniel about the value of the land.
He has taught his son the Code of the West: Respect the Land. Defend the Defenseless. Don't never spit in front of women or children. As he recites The Code once again, he immediately spits and so does Daniel. The boy is a child no longer.
The story continues with a tragedy and the boy seeking to protect what belongs to his family. He meets Pecos Bill, who rescues him from many dangers, and along the way introduces him to John Henry and then Paul Bunyan and Blue.
I will spoil the end of the picture even though I hope you will watch it because there is a very powerful message hidden in a movie no one ever heard about.
The boy returns home to find the railroad pushing through his homeland, emerging through a mountain tunnel. He makes a stand and does so in the middle of the tracks, and stands his ground in spite of the enemy trying to run him over. He puts his hand against the cow catcher on the front of the train and pushes back with all his strength and stops the train from moving. He suddenly has superhuman strength. And just as suddenly, John Henry appears to help him. So do Pecos Bill and Paul Bunyan. They overcome. But the enemy makes a last attempt to defeat the boy. He tells him that he might win for now, but that he will keep coming. He will never give up. Daniel stands up to his full height and screams, "NOT THROUGH OUR LAND!!!"  And the tunnel collapses on them both.
The townspeople, who have been watching and then helping at the last minute, hold their breath as they wait to see what will happen next. Daniel emerges in a cloud of dust and dirt; the tunnel is completely sealed. The crowd goes crazy, cheering and clapping and jumping up and down.
There is such a wonderful message here about standing your ground, even when the enemy is huge and fierce. Something so powerful  about not giving up in the face of fear.
The movie ends with the three legendary heroes suddenly coming to Daniel's home to say goodbye to him, and his father sees them. When Daniel told his parents about meeting these men, they had humored him and told him he had been dreaming.
Pecos Bill is the last to leave, and the father sees him speaking with Daniel. Pecos allows the boy to take a ride on his horse, Widowmaker, who cannot be ridden by anyone but his owner. The boy can't believe that this is happening, and climbs on, taking off across the fields at a gallop. A cyclone appears, and Pecos Bill ropes the cyclone(which is his mode of transportation in many of the tales about him) and jumps aboard, leaving Widowmaker behind. Daniel calls to him  to come back, but he goes on his way spouting a stream of legendary exploits. The horse now belongs to the boy. The father is amazed at what he sees, but turns back to the house to leave Daniel in his own place of wonderment.
As I watched this movie, I saw some wonderful biblical themes.
There is the dream of the father that he desires to pass on to his son, but the son does not want the same things. He longs for the excitement of the world.
The father tries to pass on stories of the exploits of those who have gone on before, but the son is too sophisticated to value these things. He leaves and learns amazing things while he's gone, and values things his father holds dear when he returns.

The final scenes reminded me so much of Elijah and Elisha. Elisha knows that Elijah will be taken this very day, and will not leave him. Elijah tries to get Elisha to remain behind, but he refuses. Twice. Elijah asks what he can do before he leaves, and Elisha replies that he wants to inherit a double portion of Elijah's spirit.
"You have asked a difficult thing...yet if you see me when I am taken from you, it will be yours..." The story continues with Elijah being taken up to heaven in a whirlwind, and his cloak being left behind. The LORD honors Elisha's request; the story in written in 1Kings2:1ff.
In our tall tale, the boy is Elisha and the The Widowmaker is the mantle. Pecos Bill leaves in a whirlwind just like Elijah did, and leaves behind somehing of great value. We can only imagine the mighty acts of courage that follow this young man for the rest of his days.
I love this movie. I recommend it to everyone who has children or grandchildren, and everyone who is not afraid to watch kid movies when there are no kids around. It moves me when I see it, and it makes me think. Even if you don't see what I see, you will enjoy the story of victory over the oppressor.
I love that God stops by in regular old flicks and talks to me. He says in His word that He works all things for good for those who love Him. He did again today.
If you can't find the movie I will be happy to lend it to you. That is if I'm not watching it when you ask.

Sleepless in Cape Coral

So I thought I would be blogging about my last trip next time I visited here, but instead I am awake and blogging from a friend's computer as I sit up, sleepless from too much caffeine and too much going on in my life.
I am in Florida to spend time with a precious friend who has had some dangerous and unexpected surgery. She had been having palpitations, light-headedness and pressure in her chest, and her family m.d. completely missed the diagnosis. Thank God she and her husband pursued this further, or the world would have lost a very loving woman. She had a baseball sized anyeurism on her aorta that was about ready to rupture. After a trip to the E.R., several tests, and a transfer to a second hospital and more tests, she had life saving surgery. Her aortic valve was replaced, and the anyeurism was removed; she now has Dacron tubing in its place.  However, she was still not out of the woods. During the hours after the surgery and into the night, she was bleeding. She had to have another surgery to seal off an artery that had been nicked during the first procedure. She was taken back into the O.R. at 3 a.m. for the repair, given blood to replace what she had lost, and closed up again.
I find that I cannot imagine at all what she has been through, or how we humans have been able to devise such strange and wonderful ways of repairing the human body. I am in awe of medical advances once again, as I have been many times before, like the life-saving shunt that Adam and so many others have, or the reconstruction of my own body after mastectomy, or the amazing prostheses that so many of our service men and women have needed in the last 10 years.
Anyway, I felt that I really needed to get down here and spend some time with her. She is one of my dearest friends. In fact, she is the one who shared Jesus with me. I haven't written in depth about my faith before, and actually I'm not going to do that now either. But my life was changed forever when I moved next door to her in 1977 and I'm so very glad it did. Somewhere along the line of our lives touching each others', a friend dubbed us "Laverne and Shirley". She thought we were exactly like the characters on the show. ( I am Shirley)
When I arrived on Thursday evening, she was very very sleepy and not too responsive. After so much anesthesia, so many drugs and such extensive surgery, I didn't really expect that she would be awake and talking. I came into the room and called, "Hello Laverne" She did open her eyes a few times and even made an attempt to talk, but having been extubated just a short time before I arrived, it was too difficult and her throat was too sore. She was also too weak to force enough air through her vocal chords to make any sound. But she smiled. And threw me a kiss. I promised to annoy her and keep her awake. I did my best. She did her best to wake up, but mostly slept. I prayed for her and blessed her and rejoiced quietly over her. She went back to sleep.
 Today was a different story. She was awake when we got to the hospital and looked really good. The nurses had gotten her out of bed for a short time in the early morning. She was back in bed and glad to see us when we arrived. (Her husband, sister and me) She said "Hello Shirley", and smiled at me. She was able to eat, talk ,smile and almost laugh. She hangs onto her heart pillow for coughing and for comfort. She will do that for a while...
Her daughter and family have been spending so much time there, worrying and loving and watching over her. Her 15 year old grandaughter decorated the dry erase board that is hanging on the wall for the date and other info.  I particularly like what she wrote.."hearts (insert little picture instead of the word) get broken, but (insert the math symbol for pi here...y'know...3.14to infinity)  pi goes on forever. so I pi you."  Kids are great. They speak right into what is going on if we listen. I have to admit that it took me a minute to get it..
So today I learned that doctors have come a long way in fixing broken hearts.  I wonder how far the rest of us have come in fixing different kinds of broken hearts. You know, the ones that get broken when dreams are smashed, or hopes come crashing down. The ones that get broken when marriages fail, a spouse cheats, or a loved and cherished friend or family member dies. Hearts that get broken when a miscarriage happens, or we are betrayed by some one we loved, looked up to, or trusted. How long does it take for that kind of broken heart to heal? And are we willing to lay our lives and agendas down and step aside to see the one who is hurting and try to help? I know I can't fix a broken heart, but I know Someone who  can. His name is Jesus. I met Him because someone  stopped for the one, me, and told me about Him. I can't fix a broken heart, but I can listen, love and care about one at a time. And I can get better at it as I keep trying. I'm far from perfect, but I think I am closer to loving well. Ask Laverne the next time you see her. I think she will vouch for me. I will vouch for her for sure.